Too Good to be Gone... One Year Anniversary

 Maybe the sun can come out today?  But if it doesn't, I understand.  The weather may be mourning him too.  Just like it did one year ago today when he left this earth, when the Baltimore bridge collapsed, the skies wept, and the wind screamed for him to return.  But Your voice called him home, on the day You appointed.  The day You knew since the day I stood at the altar smiling at the prince in front of me, speaking words to love and to cherish, "till death do us part" - never realizing there would actually come that day.  Your powerful sovereignty is shown strong in calling a man to leave, who would otherwise never leave.  His loyalty was a force of nature. 

Is it a coincidence the Baltimore bridge collapsed at 1:28 am the morning of March 26th? The city where he went to college and spent 11 years building his accounting career?  Maryland Governor Wes Moore said today during the one year anniversary event, "We remember the cold morning in March that changed our state forever, and we remember the tears that we shed and the uncertainty that we all felt."  

We can relate.  And I think it's fair to say, we lost two bridges that morning.  Dane was a natural peacemaker, a liaison between two opposing points of view.  He was a bridge between officer and enlisted at the Naval Academy, uniting everyone as one team.  No one really understood how it happened, but we all knew it happened after Dane walked through the doors of Bancroft Hall.  Suddenly hospital corpsmen weren't just saluting doctors and nurses, but befriending them.  I'll never forget how one of the doctors had a reputation for being mean and miserable.  Dane warmed up to him, and Doc Rizzolo afterward became everyone's favorite doctor to have duty with.  He even continued to correspond with Dane and me for many years after he retired from the Navy.  Dane had a positive impact on him, and so many others in this way.

Those who knew him as co-worker, boss and friend, knew a foxhole buddy that consistently had their back.  Those who knew him as father, knew as much as they could this side of eternity, the face of God.  Those who knew him as family, knew they were born with or married into royal blood.  I knew him as my husband, my lover, my confidante, my best friend.  His constant devotion, his unconditional love, flowed from him like a waterfall.  He was my anchor, my stabilizing force, and he balanced me.  "Healthy love is safety and freedom" is a quote from a movie that was unexpectedly touching for me.  (If you've seen "My Old Ass," you know why.) 

That feeling of stability, safety and freedom has been with me since the day we crossed paths.  I may be feeling the absence of him, and the intrusion of a life without him, but I hope I can still carry his noble presence in my heart as if he were standing by my side holding my hand.  It's a little weird to be me, without him.  I'm a little scared to face a future without his companionship and guidance.  

So God, maybe the sun can peek out for just a little while, to remind us that above all these gloomy circumstances here on earth, there is Dane, feeling the warmth of your love, in bliss, basking in eternity and timelessness, seeing your glory.  Maybe he can still be a bridge, enabling us to catch a glimpse of the glory he's experiencing, even though "no eye has ever seen and no ear has ever heard the things you've prepared for those who love You."  

Please tell him thank you for being with us... and of course, thank you for making him!  For creating that little sparkle in his eye, his generosity, his hearty laugh, his sense of humor, his genuine love for people, and that easygoing wisdom he had!  "Like apples of gold in settings of silver, is a word spoken at the right time" (Proverbs 25:11)  You know, he was our King Solomon. 

And we will see him again, (as he often said, "all in due time.")  Perhaps the ache in our hearts cannot compare to the exhilaration of reuniting with him, at the completion of our lives here on earth.  It is after all, something we're all destined to do.  Something that happens every minute of every day, to someone.  We transition when our spirit returns to you, the God of Life, the God of Love, the God who gave us Dane and now walks with him on streets of gold.  Thank you.  Please give him a hug from all of us, and help us carry on in this realm, being the best we can be, the best we became, from knowing him.